10 years had passed. An eternity it had seemed. Things most likely forgotten and foggy remembrances of the past. It was a rainy October evening. It was an unlikely place. Cold weather was making good on September promises as water fell around her. As always, she walked. Life was this way for her. An endless road where she spent her time walking. Sometimes, it was a fast pace walk which could and could not have a purpose or destination. Sometimes the walk was slow but equally aimless.
Today was a different day. She had known that when she woke. She had woken up fast. She sat up in bed and that was it. There was no slow opening of the eyes. She didn’t slowly become aware. One minute she was asleep, the next she was sitting up and automatically thinking. The whole day had been the same at work. One thought right after the other. Nothing to savor in her head. Going from one thing to the next. The day was a fast blur. Like temporary blindness. It had come and gone in what seems like seconds. Now it was 4 in the afternoon. Darkness was overtaking.
Her dark boots looked even darker wet. For a mere second she was mesmerized by seeing water being kicked around by those boots. The boots were pointy so every time they kicked a bit of water, it went far. She watched it trying to determine which foot could kick the furthest. The right one was relentless but the left one seemed to have more strength. “ What the hell… God, I hate me for this moment.”
She became aware of the presence before she saw anything. It was a muscle tensing in her back. Like a wild animal with a scent. Her head came up abruptly and she saw the dark figure almost a block away. His stance was straight and facing her. She couldn’t see his eyes but she sensed the stare. The hairs on the back of her neck stood and her scalp tightened.
Time is the best antidote.. It’s not supposed to erase but it makes things hazy and not easily remembered. Someone needs to shoot the guy that said that she thought as the memories came down upon her like a bittersweet avalanche threatening to knock her off her feet. One minute she was contemplating how fast her boots could kick a drop of water, the next her mind summoned angle of the body that stood about two hundred feet away.
She didn’t move. Just watched him. So much time of her life had been spent thinking of this exact moment. She played in her mind so many times wondering where she would be, what she would be wearing, what attitude should be used. She thought she was ready but he took one step forward and everything went to hell. She felt the trepidation and the panic begin to rise fast and to spread indecently through her body. She could taste her own fear. She couldn’t do this.
She felt lightheaded as he kept walking towards her. She should run, she thought. Her mind ordered her to. Her feet were cemented and wouldn’t obey. He was getting closer.
There was the voice screaming in her head.
He took another long step.
Run.
Her eyes wanted to water, but she fought that. She was strong enough for that.
Run.
He kept walking.
Run.
She saw his face clearly.
Run.
The light hit his face.
Run.
She could see his eyes.
She wanted to scream.
Run!
It was too late. He was in front of her
One word. That was all that was needed from him. He said it almost as a whisper. It was soft in his lips but it invoked a twister of pain in her heart. All he had to do was say her name and she felt it so strongly it almost brought her to her knees. She bit a chunk of her lips to keep her eyes in check. She wasn’t going to cry. He no longer had that power over her. He spoke again, this time asking how she was. She swallowed and spoke. Sounding cool and politely pleasant she responded and asked him the same. She could do this. She was doing great. They began to converse idly asking about family, friends, life. She leaned in a little as was her custom and he reacting by grabbing her hand. Something he absently did when in conversation. She was lost.
She stared at both their hands, cowardly refusing to look him in the eye. His hold tightened. It wasn’t hurting her physically but she felt the pressure forcing her to do what she didn’t want to. She kept her eyes low for a long time then something was pushing them up.. She fought it, cursed it. Knowing she wouldn’t win this battle. She wouldn’t go gentle though but she could not prolong it anymore and gave in. Her eyes flew right into his. He held on tighter.
Oh god.
Today was a different day. She had known that when she woke. She had woken up fast. She sat up in bed and that was it. There was no slow opening of the eyes. She didn’t slowly become aware. One minute she was asleep, the next she was sitting up and automatically thinking. The whole day had been the same at work. One thought right after the other. Nothing to savor in her head. Going from one thing to the next. The day was a fast blur. Like temporary blindness. It had come and gone in what seems like seconds. Now it was 4 in the afternoon. Darkness was overtaking.
Her dark boots looked even darker wet. For a mere second she was mesmerized by seeing water being kicked around by those boots. The boots were pointy so every time they kicked a bit of water, it went far. She watched it trying to determine which foot could kick the furthest. The right one was relentless but the left one seemed to have more strength. “ What the hell… God, I hate me for this moment.”
She became aware of the presence before she saw anything. It was a muscle tensing in her back. Like a wild animal with a scent. Her head came up abruptly and she saw the dark figure almost a block away. His stance was straight and facing her. She couldn’t see his eyes but she sensed the stare. The hairs on the back of her neck stood and her scalp tightened.
Time is the best antidote.. It’s not supposed to erase but it makes things hazy and not easily remembered. Someone needs to shoot the guy that said that she thought as the memories came down upon her like a bittersweet avalanche threatening to knock her off her feet. One minute she was contemplating how fast her boots could kick a drop of water, the next her mind summoned angle of the body that stood about two hundred feet away.
She didn’t move. Just watched him. So much time of her life had been spent thinking of this exact moment. She played in her mind so many times wondering where she would be, what she would be wearing, what attitude should be used. She thought she was ready but he took one step forward and everything went to hell. She felt the trepidation and the panic begin to rise fast and to spread indecently through her body. She could taste her own fear. She couldn’t do this.
She felt lightheaded as he kept walking towards her. She should run, she thought. Her mind ordered her to. Her feet were cemented and wouldn’t obey. He was getting closer.
There was the voice screaming in her head.
He took another long step.
Run.
Her eyes wanted to water, but she fought that. She was strong enough for that.
Run.
He kept walking.
Run.
She saw his face clearly.
Run.
The light hit his face.
Run.
She could see his eyes.
She wanted to scream.
Run!
It was too late. He was in front of her
One word. That was all that was needed from him. He said it almost as a whisper. It was soft in his lips but it invoked a twister of pain in her heart. All he had to do was say her name and she felt it so strongly it almost brought her to her knees. She bit a chunk of her lips to keep her eyes in check. She wasn’t going to cry. He no longer had that power over her. He spoke again, this time asking how she was. She swallowed and spoke. Sounding cool and politely pleasant she responded and asked him the same. She could do this. She was doing great. They began to converse idly asking about family, friends, life. She leaned in a little as was her custom and he reacting by grabbing her hand. Something he absently did when in conversation. She was lost.
She stared at both their hands, cowardly refusing to look him in the eye. His hold tightened. It wasn’t hurting her physically but she felt the pressure forcing her to do what she didn’t want to. She kept her eyes low for a long time then something was pushing them up.. She fought it, cursed it. Knowing she wouldn’t win this battle. She wouldn’t go gentle though but she could not prolong it anymore and gave in. Her eyes flew right into his. He held on tighter.
Oh god.
